What is pornography and how is it different from eroticism?
Porn is becoming more and more prevalent around us but knowing how to differentiate between pornography and eroticism can help us better understand our reactions to these images. These two things look identical but actually, they have similarities as well as differences. By understanding them, we can deal with them properly.
Etymology of pornography
The term combines two Greek words: porné (prostitute) and graphein (describe). This is why pornography can be easily defined as “a graphic, media-based form of prostitution.” A rather outrageous assessment? However, it reflects the audience's perceived reality: while performing in nude movies can still be considered an actor's profession, this is no longer the case in the context of actual pornography.
Top female porn stars may be performers, b ut certainly not actors. The genre, in fact, does not care about telling a story. It only cares about creating an aesthetic and relational context. It is only interested in sexual exchange. Finally, like it or not, we can still talk about erotic “works”, even though there is no such thing as pornographic “works”.
With or without a script
Therefore, one of the boundaries between erotic and pornographic productions lies in the presence or absence, at least of a script that “cloaks” scenes of undressing and caressing.
Another difference is: that erotic images imply more than they reveal, while pornography focuses on depicting penetration scenes very precisely. As such, eroticism can “awaken” our imagination and let it unfold. Although fantasies vary across eras and cultures (remember when a glimpse of a woman's ankles or a hint of cleavage triggered a heated reaction), the principle remains the same, and this power of suggestion is sometimes used by sex therapists.
To treat desire disorders, for example, they may suggest reading certain books or using the “daydream” technique: once the patient is in a relaxed state, they suggest situations. “You meet Caroline. The wind presses her fine knitwear against her chest...” These erotic images are therapeutic because they allow patients to be creative, and free to imagine breasts they like, small or magnificent, apple or pear-shaped. By depicting raw, anatomical sexuality, pornography does the opposite: it destroys our imagination by imposing “hyperrealism” and is downright disturbing.
Specific Language
One might think that its explicit nature gives pornographic images an educational function that contributes to sex education. However, is this really the reality it shows us?
Basically, it's not just the crudity that increases as we move from erotica to pornography: the two genres are also distinguished by very different image constructions, which respond to very specific codes. Photo porn is based on a trilogy: “direct gaze, mouth, and exposed thighs”. This representation of sexuality is nowhere near as erotic as Alfred de Vigny's poetry which is far removed from science fiction novels.
Why is this distinction important? Because this is a very particular style of writing main purpose is to trigger the desire to masturbate and not a reflection of reality. This is a very important nuance to explain to younger people so that they understand that using pornography as a model for sexual behavior is as absurd as trying to emulate a comic hero to rule one's life.
Be careful not to overdo it!
Unfortunately, many teens-even older ones-do not make this distinction and assume that pornographic representations reflect normal sexuality, which everyone should embrace. They rush to follow the codes of “what's seen on the internet” (as we used to say “what's seen on TV”), without taking into account the fact that pornography exaggerates those excesses for greater effectiveness.
Early on, young girls find themselves exposed to practices that were once unusual (at least at this age), such as sodomy, fellatio, facial ejaculation, and group sex. Their boyfriends ask them, convinced that they will gain recognition through it, and they often feel obliged to do it in order to seem “modern” or for fear of losing their loved ones.
Some couples use visual aids to stimulate themselves because they lack desire. However, when a man needs to watch porn to honor his wife, she often feels uncomfortable. She feels that it's a matter of passion and no longer desire; she feels that she is no longer there as a subject, but as a substitute object, manipulated like meat.
The main difference indeed: in pornography, the woman is only there to provoke the man's pleasure, by offering him all her openings. In an erotic relationship, her role is not demeaned, as desire is shared and restored in the enjoyment of a real exchange. This is not to condemn pornography, but it is time to clear up the confusion, to return it to its rightful place as a simple tool of passion. This will allow everyone to regain full freedom to choose their images and practices.